Written By: Braiden Belnap
Summary: We all know the saying that “opinions are like armpits, we all have them and they stink” I believe that is true. People are so quick to share their opinions of who or what other people should be or do. It is easy to let others' opinions of us affect what we do in life. So the question is how can we be strong enough to not let those opinions affect us? This is easier said than done. There was a time in my life when I valued other people's opinions (in an unhealthy way). I have learned tools to keep me from caring about others' opinions that I will be sharing with you today!
First off I want to say that this is a journey. It took me time to be able to stand up for myself and not let others persuade me against what I wanted in life. I think there is a fine balance between being humble and listening to input in a positive way and letting others dictate your decisions. Let me give you 2 examples. Picture that you are running a business. At first you treated your employees great and created an amazing working environment. As your company grew and got bigger You started slacking in taking care of your employees. One of your managers comes to you who has been there from the beginning and says, “Hey I love working here and I have enjoyed it because of the atmosphere you have created, however I feel lately that it has been lacking in xyz. I really want to see you continue to succeed in your business moving forward. I hope you take my concerns into consideration” This is an example of positive feedback and constructive criticism. This type of feedback is something you should take into consideration and look within. On the flip side this is an example of a negative opinion from someone who is trying to dictate what you should or shouldn’t do in life. Let’s say your whole family has gone to college and the expectation for you is to continue that path. Once you graduate high school you aren’t sure what career you want to go into so you want to take some time out of school to figure that out. Your parents are upset and mad because they feel that you are hurting your “family legacy” and are being selfish and stupid by not going. At that moment it hurts and you almost want to go to school to please them but it doesn’t feel right to follow in their footsteps. There’s some inner pain and turmoil that you work through. Ultimately you decide that it is your life and you need to do what’s best for you.
Those are the examples of positive and negative opinions from others. It is important to be able to separate the two and contemplate the positive. When I was struggling on how to separate them I came up with a couple questions. These questions are:
“Does this opinion serve me and my purpose?”
“Is this opinion taking me away from what I want in life?”
“Is this opinion going to hold me back from what I should be doing?”
“Does the person who is giving me this opinion want the best for me?”
“Is this opinion helping me in my purpose?”
These are a few that I have used. You will come up with more that resonate with you better but these will get you started.
I have used these questions in my own life to help me not care what others think. It has taken a while for me to get to where I am today. As you ask yourself these questions and create new ones you will gain confidence in yourself to not give into the peer pressure of others. Your life is your life and you have the reins to live it how you want to! NO ONE CAN CREATE YOUR LIFE FOR YOU UNLESS YOU LET THEM.
I hope you have learned something valuable from this blog. I post weekly on different topics to inspire and help you live a prosperous life. I Would love to connect! Linked below are my social media accounts!
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