Written By: Braiden Belnap
Summary: I feel like the Holidays are a wonderful time of year but also can be a very stressful time as well. The pressure of being with family, having to spend money on presents, work can be busier during this time, and still trying to keep up with your routine can be a lot. I have a few tools that I use in my life that help me through the holidays which are boundaries, having a schedule, and taking time for myself. In this blog I break down how I have each of those set up in my life and how you can use those tools in your life during the holidays.
I used to naturally lean towards being a people pleaser. I always felt the need to show up and say yes to everything. That was something that after I got married I couldn’t do as much. I had to start saying no to some things and saying yes to other things. So how did I start being okay with saying no? I might be lucky because I have an awesome family who understands boundaries so when I started saying no they were very understanding. Something I have learned however is that not every family is like mine. If you say no to a family activity someone or people take personal offense to that. When the truth is that you are only one person with only so much time. So if you have family members that are disrespectful towards you, boundaries are going to actually help your relationship be better. You won’t feel as spread thin and emotionally exhausted. So how do you set a boundary during the holidays? For example, You get invited to a family dinner but you need to go shopping that night for christmas presents. You can say “Thank you for the invite, unfortunately I won’t be able to make it. I have other commitments I have to do.” If someone tries to guilt trip you or make you feel bad you can restate that, cut the conversation off, or give them another option of when you can make it. It is important to prioritize yourself during the holidays and not spread yourself too thin or you will burnout.
Next I have a schedule. Having a schedule allows me to be able to get more accomplished during the holidays without feeling overwhelmed. I set up my schedule every month with my daily routine and what things I have planned on the calendar. I leave space open specifically for activities for the holidays. So I highly recommend you apply that into your life. This schedule also helps with setting boundaries because you know your schedule and what you can and can’t do.
Finally I believe having time for yourself is important. You can only spend so much time with people and it is good to be able to have a reset and take time for yourself doing the things that make you happy. Doing this will make it so you have more confidence in yourself and don’t feel so exhausted.
I hope you have been able to learn something from today’s blog. I share a new positive message every wednesday. I also have a podcast where I go more into depth on this topic. I would love to connect. Linked below are my social media accounts.
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